K. A. Cook is an abrosexual, aromantic, genderless, autistic, queer adult who experiences chronic pain and mental illness. Ze writes creative non-fiction, personal essays and novels about the above on the philosophy that if the universe is going to make life interesting, ze may as well make interesting art. Ze can be found online at Queer Without Gender and @aroworlds.
Pronouns: ze/hir/hirs or they/them/theirs (auxiliary, spoken usage only).
I identify as arovague/nebularomantic and idemromantic, as autism significantly shapes and impacts my aromanticism. My abrosexuality includes shifts in the genders to who I am attracted along with shifts in the intensity of said attraction, but I am always multisexual (pansexual, polysexual or trixensexual) and I will sometimes identify as these identities alone.
(To explain: I don’t see a meaningful difference between autistic-accommodating romantic and platonic relationships/attraction, hence the nebularomanticism. I do categorise certain relationship behaviours and expressions of attraction as romantic based on their neuronormativity, hence the idemromanticism. And since there’s nothing about my aromanticism not shaped by autism, arovague!)
While I do experience an asexual-spectrum identity in my abrosexuality, I am an allo-aro writer, blogger and community member. I am not aro-ace and do not identify as part of the asexual community. Generally, I’ll describe myself as allo-aro, abrosexual aromantic or abrosexual nebularomantic/idemromantic.
I am not sex or romance repulsed, although I am often alienated by the omnipresence of (neuronormative) romance narratives. I am also alienated by the expectation that romance repulsion or negativity is a default aromantic experience.
I identify as both transmasculine and agender. I am more comfortable with masculine shapes of expression and experience, but I reject the use of words historically associated with a binary gender identity to describe me or my gender identity. I do not have a gender and also reject the use of words associating “agender” with “neutral gender” to describe me or my genderlessness.
Because a good deal of information about me is already available on the internet, I don’t give out my age. For folks who need more specificity, I’ll state that I’m not a teenager and I’m a little bit older than some aro-specs.
If you’d like to know a little more about me, please see my artist profile.
I gather stim toys (favourites include squishy plush and Tangles), listen to European melodic metal (favourite bands are Dark Tranquillity, Eluveitie and Kamelot) and consume most things spec-fic (although I’m more fantasy-leaning than science fiction). Favourite authors include Tamora Pierce, N. K. Jemisin, Robin Hobb and Lois McMaster Bujold; favourite TV shows include Farscape, Dark Matter, Dr Who, the UK Being Human, Warehouse 13, Community and (although it isn’t spec fic) Mythbusters.
(Supernatural isn’t exactly a favourite, but I am a fan of allo-aro Dean Winchester. I also have a burning want to discuss Stargate: Atlantis‘s creation of another accidental allo-aro in John Sheppard…)
I scrapbook and collect fashion dolls and Sylvanian Families figurines, for which I like to sew and craft when my hands allow. I’ve made handbags, dresses, miniature foods and other small accessory and clothing items.
⁕ Tumblr ⁕
@alloaroworlds: An archive/community blog collecting only allo-aro-specific posts and content. I also post intra-community discussion pieces about allo-aro experiences, erasure and antagonism.
@stimtoybox: An archive of stim toy informative, review and tutorial posts, along with odd neurodiversity, autism, disability and chronic pain discussions. If you want to know more about my disabilities, this is the place to go.
⁕ Websites ⁕
Queer Without Gender: my personal website and archive for all my fiction, books, publications and other projects.
⁕ Financial ⁕
Ko-fi: a place where you can help me keep writing by buying me digital beverages!
Patreon: a place where you can get early and exclusive content for only $1 a month!
I’ve spent years in LGBTQIA+/queer spaces feeling erased because most works that depict my trans, pan and disability identities feature characters in (neuronormative) romantic relationships. The message I learnt is that a romantic happy ending is the only right way to counter the dehumanisation I experience. As much as I believe romance narratives for marginalisation should exist, its omnipresence leaves me alienated from much of the extant representation. My goal on this website is to do something about that!
I write original speculative fiction, more commonly short stories and novelettes, about adult queer, trans, disabled, autistic and aro-spec protagonists. Please note that while most of my works aren’t explicit, I do include sexual references. Projects like Hallo, Aro specifically depict aromanticism as shaped by allosexual attraction, and I do tend to focus on allo-aro or attraction-experiencing characters.